BMS

i swear sometimes you make me so fuckin mad. i swear i dont understand you. why do you even care? i know you dont really even care so why are we having this stupid ass conversation? you make me wanna knock you the fuck out sometimes well in reality all the time. see that shit right there dumb fuckin text messages you couldve just let it the fuck alone but naw. its always about you. ugh... fuckin men!!!! i hate all of you..


sigh

but yeah now thats off my chest lets go back to this morning.

i asked you to send me pictures because i wanted to put some of your pictures away. i swear something about you makes me want you so bad. its crazy. its been a little over a year now im really guessing a year. and back then you woukd tell me that you werent the relationship type. maybe that was just for me. i dont know. but youve changed so i guess thats a good thing.. maybe. hmm i really dont know ne more.

i miss my little brother man. i cant wait until he can come home again. i fuckin miss all the loud noise and all the bullshit in the house... lol when i think about it was it was actually kinda nice you know what i mean? of course not you werent here. sigh... but yeah i miss you and i cant wait until your home again. i love you more than i love myself and actually it shouldnt even be like that but thats how it is.

im really sleepy. i didnt sleep much last night. mainly because i was uncomfortable. isnt that weird? how when you can have sex with someone and then are uncomfortable with sleeping with em? hmm maybe thats just me? i dont know. one day ill figure it out. soon i hope...
sigh... i had another convo with drake. well at least i thought it was him. maybe not though who knows. people are so crazy these days. they"ll do anything to try and hurt another persons feelings. i guess thats just life though. oh god please help me find peace within. i tired of myself... is that really possible to be tired of ones self? i mean like there self being??? one day i hope to find out the true answers to the questions i ask myself. sooner than later i hope. i want a certain peace that only the good ones find. then again there i have to question the fact of the matter.. Am i a good person? if i could answer all my stupid questions to that one id say most of the time. hmm man i dont know. right now my mind is everywhere. everywhere else but no where really. i miss you... aqm i hope that your doing well. and for the most part that your happy babe. i love you... and in time i hope that youll see that. hmm sometimes i question that too. is it really love that i feel for him or it is just a state of lonliness... i think i spelled that correct. i dont know. damn do i really love him or is it just lust. i know its not lust because even before the lust i felt a love. yes i do love him. when i thought about that in my mind i smiled. i thought of his smile. it was beautiful... hmm i dont know. i wonder how it would be if he had the same feelings for me? would i still act the same? or would i not care anymore because id feel that it was somewhat point less. maybe who knows...but i guess until that day happens i guess ill just be wondering hoping and wishing lol. its really not funny but i didnt know nething that i could put. i love you anthony...



- JUiCE

HOUSTATLANTAVEGAS

I HEARD THAT SONG FOR FIRST TIME THE OTHER DAY . THAT SHIT IS HOT..
EVERY TIME I HEAR THAT SONG IT JUST GIVES ME CHILLS I REALLY CANT EXPLAIN WHY, BUT ITS TRUE.

so he wrote back..

i found out that he was coming to nevada. man you know i was crazy to hear that right.?. Lol haha thata crazy huh? i think its awesome. haha but yeah let me continue. i wanted to know if it was true so i wrote him and asked. he wrote back and said yes then said hit him up when he touches down. lol wow i think thats so cool. so yeah next time hes on the space ill ask him more. i just thought id let everyone know that lol im happy now. oh yeah and if anyones lost im talking about mickey factz lol get with the program.

IN LOVE?

YO I SWEAR I FEEL WHAT PEOPLE BE TALKING ABOUT WHEN THEY SAY THEY FELL IN LOVE WITH HIP HOP. OMG I FEEL WHAT THEY SAYING BIG TIME. LAST NIGHT I WAS UP UNTIL LIKE 4 IN THE MORNING JUST LISTENING. I MEAN REALLY HEARING IT ALL. MAN I WAS HOOKED. IN LOVE DREAMING WATCHING SMILING, REALLY FEELING MYSELF YAH DIGG. I NEVER THOUGHT THAT YOU COULD FALL FOR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. SOMETHING THAT PEOPLE CANT FEEL SEE OR HOLD YOU. IT FEELS STRONG YOU KNOW, JUST THE WAY IT DOES WHEN YOUR IN LOVE WITH A MAN OR WOMAN. I COULDNT BELIEVE HOW PASSIONATE IT WAS. SO POWERFUL AND YO I FELT WEAK, WEAK BECAUSE ID NEVER IMAGINED THAT I WOULD BE ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE... WOW ITS AMAZING. I SMILE AS A WRITE THIS BECAUSE I FEEL A LITTLE WEIRD PUTTING MAH FEELINGS OUT LIKE THIS.

HE SAID HES LEAVING TUESDAY

HE SAYS HES LEAVING TUESDAY.
PART OF ME DOESNT WANT HIM TO GO.
ITS NOT MY CHOICE ,TO SAY ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT THAT THOUGH
I KINDA WISH I WISH I DIDNT CARE
BECAUSE THEN IT WOULDNT HURT SO BAD.
I HATE THE FEELING I GET WHEN HE LIVES MY HOUSE,
SO JUST IMAGINE THE FEELINGS ILL HAVE THEN.
I KNOW HELL BE BACK BUT I WONT BE THAT SOON
I CARE ABOUT ABOUT HIM SO MUCH,
&& IN THE BEGINNING
I DIDNT UNDERSTAND WHY.
IT WAS LOVE WAY BEFORE I EVEN KNEW IT.
I FELT THAT I SHOULD GIVE IN TO HIM BECAUSE I HAD FELT SO DEEP.
SOMETIMES I WISH THAT WE WOULDVE MET SOONER.
BECAUSE THEN ID KNOW HOW YOU SWEET YOU WERE
I SWEAR IF I COULD I'D REMIND YOU EVERYDAY.
BUT EVEN THEN I DONT THINK YOU GET IT. YOUR
MORE THAN WHAT I TELL YOU AT TIMES. I TRY SO HARD SOMETIMES TO LET YOU FEEL MAH HEART BUT IT DOESNT WORK. BUT HOPEFULLY ONE DAY YOULL FEEL WHAT I TELL YOU. SO UNTIL THEN I SIT PATIENT UNTIL THE TIME IS RIGHT.

A LiTTLE SOMETHiNG FROM NEW YORK

ONE DAy IM GONNA BE THERE LiViNG My WONDERFUL LiFE!!! WOW iTSz BEAUTiFUL HUH?

ITSZ BAYBEE LA'S BIRTHDAY

OMG GIRL

YOUR 20 NOW
LOL FUCKIN WOWERZ
LOL

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOVE YOU TO DEATH
YOUR THE BEST. I HOPE YOUR BABES DOING REALLY
WELL OKAY, BECAUSE I KNOW I HAVENT TALKED TO YOU IN FOREVER. BUT YOU OF ALL PEOPLE SHOULD KNOW WHAT THE BUSINESS IS. I MISS YOU AND I CANT WAIT UNTIL YOU COME HOME. HMMMVI DONT KNOW WHAT ELSE TO SAY BUT YOUR THE FUCKIN BEST HAHAHA LOVE YOU MUCH!






MAH BEST BITCH LOL

BACK AT HOME

DAMN SO YEAH I FINALLY CAME BACK HOME TODAY.



ITS FEELS SORT OF GOOD BEING BACK HOME. I MISSED IT.



HMM. SO I TOLD HIM THAT I KNEW HE HADA GIRLFRIEND AND HE TRIED TO LIE ABOUT IT. ITS LIKE IF ITS TRUE WHICH WE BOTH KNEW IT WAS WHY ARE YOU EVEN GONNA TRY TO LIE ABOUT IT. ITS SO STUPID. WOW. I KINDA WISH I WOULDVE CALLED HIM AND TOLD HIM THAT SHIT. HA THAT WOULDVE BEEN FUNNY AS HELL TO ME. I DONT KNOW MAYBE NOW IT WOULD HAVE BUT RIGHT NOW ITS NOT... NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT. MAINLY BECAUSE I LIKED HIM SO FUCKIN MUCH. DAMN WAS I STUPID. SILLY OF ME LMAO...







THATS WHAT I SHOULDVE CALLED THIS BLOG. I WAS STUPID ASS FUCK FOR THAT ONE. ITS LIFE THOUGH RIGHT. SHIT HAPPENS, PEOPLE GET HURT THEN YOU MOVE ON RIGHT? HOPE FULLY I MOVE ON FROM THIS SHIT I KNOW I WILL BECAUSE IT WASNT THAT SERIOUS YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? I DONT KNOW THOUGH I GUESS TIME WILL ONLY TELL YOU KNOW. ONE DAY ILL LOOK BACK AT THIS AND BE LIKE WAS I FUCKIN SERIOUS LOL . ILL LAUGH REAL HARD AT THIS SHIT. *SIGH* SOME DAY THOUGH... UNTIL THEN ILL JUST DWELL NOT TOO MUCH THOUGH BECAUSE I GOT SHIT TO DO YAH DIGG...



SONG OF THE DAY= CAN YOU STAND THE RAIN
ARTIST= NEW EDITION



I HOPE EVERYTHING REALLY DOES HAPPEN FOR A REASON...

SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME FIND MY REASON.

i REALLy...

excuse me for what im about to say.


i thought people were crazy when they said that love was blind.

naw im serious... dead ass... lol i put that so people would think that i was laughing. like ha ha or something. but inside to be honest im dying. this is serious damn fuck i just keep saying it. everything happens for a reason right? OF COURSE IT DOES IT HAS TO. FUCK!!!! damni really need my glasses like naw for real because im really fuckin blind. how the fuck didnt i see that bullshit.its life thats life fuck it. fuck love. the bullshit in the little movies i 'd watch were just fuckin movies. stupid fuckin lame ass movies.... BITCH.... FUCK WHAT THE FUCK? OVER AND OVER AGAIN.... FUCKED IT AINT SUPPOSE TO HAPPEN.... OH WELL WHAT ELSE HMMM. I THINK THATS ALL I GOTTA SAY UNTIL LATER ON.....

HAPPy biRTHDAy LiSA LiSA!!!!!

HEY I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT YOUR BECOMING ONE OF MY GOOD FRIENDS LOL
ITS SO CRAZY BECAUSE WE'RE SO MUCH ALIKE... YOUR FREAKIN AWESOME KAY!!!!

XOXOX

JUICY

NEW PICTURES

HiP H0P

i WANNA CREATE AN0THER bL0G bUT JUST ALL Ab0UT HiP H0P.

EVERy0NE iVE T0LD THiNKS iTS C00L. S0 iLL SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

0H yEAH && THiS iS MiCKEy!!!

RAiNy && CL0UDy DAyS

i swear I hate rainy days.
It makes everything so fuckin gay. No one wants to come outside. its cold. Hella ugly outside... I fuckin hate it.

iN THE LAUNDRy MAT

Y0 S0 iTS ALM0ST TiME F0R ME T0 G0 T0 W0RK. i G0TTA bE THERE AT 9:30AM S0 YEAH I G0T TIME T0 WRITE YUHS SOMETHING BEF0RE W0RK. HMM WHAT T0 SAY WHAT T0 SAY? I L00K SUPER CUTE T0DAY! I thought THAT YUH ALL SH0ULD KN0W THAT HA HA HA. LAST NIGHT WAS SAD I CRIED A LITTLE BIT BUT ITS COOL N0W. FEBRUARY 12,2009 S0 FAR G0NE. I G0TTA D0WNL0AD THE WH0LE THING T0DAY! W0W C0NGRATS BABY YUH DESERVE IT YUHR AWES0ME. JUST FREAKIN AMAZING L0L DIGG ME!

Hmm what else can I say? I hope today goes by so fast, becausei kinda don't feel like being at work today but I know I need the money son. Like super much. Hmmm what else oh yeah im tite with him today. H doesn't know why but I'm not gonna talk to him for awhile I'm getting too attached yo and that's mos def not cool not even alittle...
I've been talking to brandon a lot though. He's cool for the most part. I can tell he likes me a lot too, but I don't really like him as much as I did last year son. I mean last year he was it... nothing came close to brandon skeete. Lol I love his name its dope lol. 0h yeah mah green purse is hella awesome ha ha =] it holds so much shit. I fuckin love it. Everyone I've asked says that I should get a green laptop too. But I want a yellow one for some odd reason. Yellows just so cute lol maybe its just me I don't know. Omg I'm hella random today I don't know mah mind wonders so much. So those of yuh who read this sorry if it doesn't make any sense. I had tons of sugar this morning so im wildn lol=]

LAST but not LEAST iM s0 happy for DRAKE! 0mg no one knows yuhr so freakin awesome. Man congrats again and again. =]

♥ JUiCy [b]
xoxox

DRAKE

S0 yEAH iF yUH KN0W ANyTHiNG AB0UT ME, yUH KN0W THAT i L0VE DRAKE!
HE'S AMAZiNG... 0CT0BERSVERy0WN.bL0GSP0T.C0M PRESENTS S0 FAR G0NE!!! iTSZ DRAKE'S NEW MiXTAPE. iVE bEEN LiSTENiNG T0 S0ME 0F THE S0NGS && iM L0ViN' iT. HE'S A [[GENiUS]]. DAMN y0 i H0PE T0 MEET HiM S0ME DAy bECAUSE i FEEL HiM yUH KN0W. HiS LyRiCS ARE b0LD && HE'S N0T AFRAiD T0 SAy THiNGS. i ADMiRE PE0PLE LiKE THAT. THAT'S iT...

♥ JUiCy

iTSZ bEEN 2 L 0 N G...

S0RRy i HAVEN'T WR0TE ANyTHiNG iN F0REVER... i HAVEN'T HAD MAH SiDEKiCK iN WH0 KN0WS H0W L0NG. i WENT T0 MAH DADS && LEFT MAH CHARGER STUPiD M0VE RiGHT??? YES i KN0W.. 0MG i WAS S0 PiSSED. UGH... AFTER iNC0ME TAX iM G0NNA bUy A LAPT0P. i NEED 0NE. i MEAN i L0VE bL0GGiNG 0N MAH PH0NE bUT iT'D bE S0 MUCH EASiER 0N A N0TEb00K.



S0 THiNGS ARE GETTiNG VERy iNTERESTiNG WiTH MR. PBC && i... L0L HE'S S0 SEXy 0MG i WiSH i LiVED iN NEW y0RK 0R HE LiVED HERE.. WELL N0T iN VEGAS L0L S0ME WHERE ELSE bUT CL0SER T0 ME. MAN i LiKE HiM S0 MUCH. iM STARTiNG T0 THiNK HE'S MAH "S0METHiNG S0 DEEP" L0L i D0NT KN0W yET. WE'LL SEE HA HA HA.

G00D NiGHT

JUiCE

L0VE = PAiN

SO FUCK LOVE!!!!!

N0T MUCH SLEEP

S0 0KAy i DiDNT GET MUCH SLEEP LAST NiGHT. i D0NT REALLy FEEL THE NEED T0 SLEEP bECAUSE JUST S0 HAPPENS i MiSS 0UT 0N A L0T 0F THiNGS, S0 WHAT'S THE P0iNT????
i STAyED UP M0ST 0F THE NiGHT READiNG 0THER PE0PLES bL0GS, (WHiCH i TH0UGHT WAS JUST THE M0ST iNTERESTiNG THiNG i C0ULD bE D0iNG AT 3 S0METHiNG iN THE M0RNiNG ANyWAy.) PE0PLE bL0G Ab0UT THE M0ST REALEST iSH yUH C0ULD EVER iMAGiNE. i C0ULD READ bL0GS ALL DAy iF i WANTED T0. N0 REALLy i C0ULD. L0L LiKE iF N0 0NE WERE T0 b0THER ME WiTH STUPiD QUESTi0NS && ST0RiES I'D D0 iT. iVE REALiZED THAT iTS N0T JUST Ab0UT EVERy0NE ELSE && WHAT THEy THiNK Ab0UT A T0PiC... yUH CAN WRiTE WHATEVA yUHR FEELiNG AT THE TiME. iD RATHER bE READiNG 0THER PE0PLES bL0GS THAN T0 DEAL WiTH HALF THE SHiT i G0 THR0UGH 0N A DAy T0 DAy bASiS ANy WAy. HUH? THAT'S CRAZy T0 SAy bUT TRUE... i D0NT FEEL S0 JUDGED by THE W0RLD WHEN iM READiNG 0R bL0GGiNG i PUT 0N L0UD MUSiC T0 TUNE 0UT SHiT THAT D0ESNT MATTER. i FEEL AT PEACE WiTH MySELF RiGHT HERE RiGHT N0W. && i ENJ0y THiS FEELiNG....

THROW BACCCKKK

DAMN THAT WAS HELLA THROW BACK LOL BUT I STiLL LOVE iT

free write

please dont mind this one because im just writing exactly whats on mah mind right now. and at this current moment its yuh. i hate that mah heart moves faster than i actually tell it to. im going to fast way to fast i tell myself but i dont wanna slow down. one minute im slowing down then you say or do something to make me feel like thats what im suppose to be doing. its not suppose to be like that. thats what happens everytime when i just listen to my heart and not mah mind the signs are all there but its like i just cant see them. too blind to realize the truth,well this time i dont know whats actually going on. ive been in this situation before. [ the music] one. but last time that nigga was just hella crazy so i dont know what to say about that nigga lol. i dont know man i just dont wanna get hurt again when i put mah hurt into things like this it always gets hurt. like never fails and i really dont feel like it again. but i feel like hes so different. so different. what do i do about the way im feeling, its too fast i must slow down and focus stay really focused because i know how itll turn out if i dont. Lord please help me stay strong because i really dont know what to do. its like every since he said yo i was hooked. he calls me his juicy. i love that. no one does that for me, and he does. i wanna feel love like everyone else. i think i deserve to be happy this year. this year has to be different. because i want this ish forever...